Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Update


1. A move happened.
And while my arms and legs burn like I just shimmied up Everest (it was actually just the two back flights of stairs to Kirst's apartment, scaled 600 or so times), and my Achilles tendons are threatening to snap if I break out into sudden dance (which I have been known to do), our relationship surprisingly shows no signs of wear. Now, I'm not going to lie. It was completely shocking to arrive Thursday night and, instead of finding her apartment in a state of neatly boxed moving appropriateness, open the door to this:



"What!" she says. "I've been doing stuff!"

"I didn't say anything!"

The fact is, there are an inconceivable amount of things that need to be done when you suddenly have two weeks to move your entire life to a new state, new job, new car. And in between taking care of business, Kirst launched a full-on bi-state farewell tour that included seeing each of her closest friends at least twice (four if they have a baby), and getting in one last meal at each of her 25 favorite restaurants. What can I say, the girl's a social butterfly, and it's one of the things I adore about her (we both have August birthdays but I always say she's the real Leo). So packing was a low priority and ended up getting done during and up until the final seconds of move-out day. But in the end, we nailed it, and within about 36 hours the monolith of mess you saw above had been safely transported to Michigan and stacked in the 50 square feet of floor space that we call The Manor.







2. The saga continues. A couple of weeks ago I alerted you to the world series of trash talk, a comments section on a site for illegally downloading movies. Believe it or not, those idiots are still going at it.

If someone were compiling an anthology of their caveman hate poetry, FORSALE8859's entry from five days ago would have to make the cut. I quote:

MastaKillaWu GO SUCK METHODMAN‘S COCK THEN GO HOME AND SUCK YOUR DADS DICK...MIX IT TOGETHER AND MEET UP WITH THEESPARTAN GUY OVER THERE...SWAP SPIT WITH HIM WHEN YOUR MOUTH IS LOADED.... TAKE IT OVER TO THAT IRISH DRUNK FUCK THERE SMEXYCLOUDSTRIFE DIE THE LOAD GREEN BECAUSE THAT HOW HE LIKES IT...AT THE POINT IAM PRETTY SURE SKSK30 AND TNWAHTAM WILL ALSO BE THERE ASWELL SMOKINGPOLE....EVERYONE ENJOY


No less eloquent though, was crom271's brilliant little stanza posted 6 hours ago (this thread war has been going strong for over a week!):

paulzoeknate I am not suprised that you agree with forsales. Gay‘s always agree together. So fuckin fagget keep your opinion to yourself and do what you are doing best...Go suck a dick


If this keeps up it's going to fester into some kind of mini world war, with UN peace keepers and secret prisons. Was it Robert Frost who wondered if the world would end in fire or ice? Maybe it ends in douchebaggery.

2 comments:

Kirsten said...

Does it matter that among the things I DID do before your arrival was buy you some chips and salsa and even your favorite Power Bar to leave at your bedside when I left for an appointment the next morning????

Nah. Didn't think so.

Lasferatu said...

HHAHAHAHA! That looks JUST like my parents' basement before I nearly single-handedly moved most of it to the front lawn for the He-Man trash men.